you're so fucking beautiful.

vidette weimin pascal eric me mark, not forgetting hamdan now.all these peeeple from class 05/06. hmm not the best photo but at least it got us all inside and is clear compared to th others. and. ya stuffs happened between all of us. pascal is no longer in darch..but at least we still meet hmm. i know im not exactly the best kind of friend, but anyway thanks for always being there, and really, everything. idk if things are going to be okay, but i guess it will in time. i know it will. im sorry if ive caused this to happen. and weimin, i really didnt think you're someone i want to fight back to, moreover you were really right, just like pascal has said. same for vidette.. sorry for me being an idiot. sorry to you both for making you both worry bout me so much that such things'd happen. not forgetting pascal and eric that'd always be a listening ear. and..of course, mark. things happens. and you and pascal were my first friends from poly. and still is. def still feel close with you both. and i hope none of this is ever going to change even in time. regardless what happens, we'd still be okay all together in the end.

we've tried. we were happy. now, its what's best for us. im just glad i did not lose you. to say the truth, im relieved for things to be back this way again. good times.

for everything else. i just hope, for things to turn for the better.

idk why i chose this photo, so unglam, but i just thought.i looked happy.

i never thought you were someone who'd erase memories. i didnt notice you've actually deleted me away from fb. but i guess this is best for us. i know your life will be better without me. im sorry for having ignored you, but i never regretted making that choice. now, you're just a memory, a memory i'd never forget.

hmm. so. thursdays huh. apparently, 2 weeks ago vidette encountered something similar, last week, it was weimin. this week it was me. our studio's toilet. hmm. vidette heard flushing sound when no one inside. weimin heard toilet roll sound when no one inside. i heard someone call my name and i saw a shadow entering the cubicle next to me. i came out, no one. fml. k enough of that.

so..ive been seeing so many friends together with someone they're happy with. i cant help but feel happy for them, yet at the same time, i envy them, cos i dont know if im able to feel that way again. even my close bro has found someone im pretty sure he will be happy with.. (: lately..ive also seen friends who've left someone whom had once made them happy, ive seen how fuckedup things can be. it felt like so much has happen this week and im having a really hard time trying to absorb everything.

somehow im starting to relieve that feeling again. but will it end up backfiring on me?

we've been close friends for over a year, and we've been good that way. im really worried we might screw this friendship but im happy this way now. but what i dont get is why you always make me doubt your words and actions. its like. simply put it. "you give me one, i take another, you take back both"sigh. i really hope everything will be okay.

and fuck this post was supposed to be sent ytd. thanks to my grandma and my sis's big mouth. already not in the mood for anything still had to go through shit last night. irritating as hell and im currently not allowed to use my labtop for now. it was on a risk of being hammered by my dad again. last night was fucked up as hell, but lucky i managed to just have a good sleep cos of the friends around me. thankyou.

okay back to today. shitload of work to do. need chiong and finish everything up. needa keep next week at least by friday, free. movie with brian! if not i owe him meal sia haha. kbye.

im sorry girl, thank you for always being so understanding..even after i disappointed you time and time and again...i hope it wont be another half hug the next time :(

anyway. i had my crit on thursday and i told myself that i could do it, and i made an improvement. but i feel bad i chasing this one friend out of the adrc. and made sure he doesnt see me for my crit. and he just had to act angry. zzz. things are alright now i guess.

hmm this week, was pretty crazy. it felt like too many changes happened within just 3days.

ive prolly hurt a friend due to this. ive prolly done the wrong thing for letting it be.

but i guess its over now, i hope this is the right choice. i dont want to see yet another person hurt because of my neglection to be more aware of what's going on around me.